I cried and cried, , if he would leave me, but also wondering if I would ever be happy, ever be sexually satisfied, ever find a way to make this work. His face appeared in my inbox and a lightning bolt shivered down my spine. My only options are to put up with it or divorce her. Sounds like an interesting read and I love broadening my sexual acumen. Please do not remove this message until. I have zero desire to be intimate with anyone other than her. Part of the bargain is that you should also be able to have what you need.
At 44, she had never felt so comfortable in her own skin. I lost control of the situation due to inexperience and a false sense of duty not to spoil an experience for my wife. And blackmail can never be regarded as love, or respect. Be single and share to your hearts content. All I wanted was their maleness, the very thing they most liked giving.
This seems extremely reasonable to me. Other couples have a 'don't ask, don't tell' policy. We give each other what we need, including freedom and space. Maybe she wanted to sow her wild oats. I know it may sound decadent or like a throwback to the free love of the '60s.
She has destroyed all trust I had. She was so lost in him and he in her. It is probably true, as so many commenters urge, that nonmongamy is not a cure to a troubled relationship. We have wealthy friends all around the world whose sexy company we enjoy. With that said, it doesn't sound healthy anyway, so maybe that's for the best.
Thanks for your response, Georgi! Because of the intensely physical nature of sex, we tend to think of it as outside the spectrum of the day-to-day relationship—its own special category. That never happens in a relationship if there is fear of reprisal. As for why I say I'm wired for monogamy. Millions have trusted others with their private needs and quandaries, only to discover that the one answer besides admonition to remain respectful and selfless loving of others, is the answer they seek is to follow selfless love and practice self-respect as the recipient of selfless love. If church members only begin to study all the deceptions the church plays on its members about sex and marriage, then honest people leave the church or demand its leadership support the entire scope of the book they claim to follow.
You're doing a great job trying to find a solution that makes both of your happy. Third, if it weren't for my parter'so understanding I don't think I would be able totall about my issues openly and honestly. Who do you really want, and why? Her relationship with him was cheating ~ just like yours was. Text messages let us communicate on the run, and online calendars make it much simpler to see when everyone is free. I have suggested baby steps like a threesome that is just meaningless with me there, but he now says he wants it all and the freedom to do it all with trust. I guess also I have believed that romantic love was finite.
She knows that I love her but she wants another person I am stressed at home marriage , work that I have and I am worried we lose our house unable to pay the mortgage. Generally, non-monogamous people tend not to be very religious. We're a lot happier and I've learned to be a ton more respectful. She cried when we shared love that night. Like when I don't tell him something and it comes up later, making him feel out of the loop, something I try desperately to avoid. How do you and your wife make it work? I have no judgement on her for desiring this only the hurt i feel for a year wasted on someone i thought was my soul mate.
How is my wife going to react, I wonder, when I tell her about this? Know when to quit having discussions about it. If you don't know any couple who does this, invent a rumor about someone from work that your wife doesn't know. Not sure if any of this will help or be of assistance but I just wanted to point out to you that your wife is not an evil or awful person. But sometimes, emotionally, it's hard. I agree that she essentially wants to have her cake and eat it too i. Whether you do or not, I think that part of the bargain might have to be that she is willing to accept that you may have the freedoms that she would take for herself.