It may look like a needle, but baby it works like a sowing machine! How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus? Will you let me be the sun and warm that cold shoulder your giving me. You were so ugly at birth, your parents named you Shit Happens. I used to work in a shoe-recycling shop. Your like an energy drink, I need you to keep going Wanna come to my house and play telephone, I got the string and you got cans. Q: Why are Helium, Curium, and Barium the medical elements? A neutrino walks into a bar … and keeps going! The next day, the boy was walking down the road with the monkey on his shoulder again, when he passed the same policeman. Want to hear a joke about paper? It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.
Will you be my love buffet so I can lay you out on a table and take anything I want? Yo family so black, when they hold hands, it looks like a stretch limo. If you see a robbery at an Apple Store does that make you… an iWitness? There aren't enough O's in the word smooth to describe how smooth you are. I will be a Dixie Chick and you be my cowboy. Am I pleased to see you or did I just put a canoe in my pocket You must work in a library because you just increased my circulation! They say apples don't fall far from the tree, so that must mean your mom's hot too Girl do you have a fever cause you sure look hot! Remember, the good old days when we were kids, and we did nothing but watch cartoons or read comic books and eat cereal all day? Why do cow-milking stools only have three legs? If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together. I have an addiction to cheddar cheese. You're so ugly, your pet name is Scooby-Doo. Their doctor tells them that many people find it useful to write themselves little notes.
Yo mama so black, she looks like a picture of outer-space with no stars. You're so ugly, that you can turn milk into yogurt, just by looking at it. If I flip this coin, what are the chances of me getting head tonight? I used to hate facial hair… … but then it grew on me. One is a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean. Cause you make me want to dive in.
You're so ugly, you have to sneak up on your mirror. Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar? Wow I must be good at darts because I hit a bullseye with you Damn Girl, your about to make the rocket in my pants blast off! Do you need some nicotine cause your body's smokin! Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Yo mama so black, her nickname is evening. You're so ugly, when you look in the mirror your reflection turns to stone. One week later, the man again goes into his son's room to wish him goodnight. The lawyer interrupted again and said, Judge, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the Highway Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine.
That is until he came up to Lancelot. Things get even hotter, and the guy asks again. The son this time says that he has dreamt that Daddy had died. To get in tough with us, simply send us an email at contact funnyworm. Your name must be winter because you're about to be coming. The left ear, the right ear, and the final front-ear! The son replies he is scared because he has dreamt that Auntie Susie had died. A woman noticed her husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach.
For instance, green is a combination of cyan and yellow, but green printed fine. It took me a while to work out it was just a Fanta sea. What do you call someone who immigrated to Sweden? Women always say men think with their dick so why don't you blow my mind!. Cos damn it honey, your body is really kickin. When you die, you should have your brain donated to science.
I may not be able to knock bottom, but I'll scrape the shit out of the sides! Have you ever slid down a rail, She says no would you like to slide down mine. Screw me if I am wrong, but haven't we met before? Yo mama so black, she got her tattoo done in chalk. A man asks a farmer near a field: Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? Because you're the only ten I see! Do you know, your hair and my pillow are perfectly colour coordinated. What did the left butt cheek say to the right butt cheek? You're so hot you would make the devil sweat. Your so old , the first airport was the wright brothers.
Hey babe ,I am a pirate and I want to take that booty home. Drop a packet of sugar on the floor next to the girl you are after. It is bad because people believe it all. Why did the scarecrow win an award? If i filp a coin what are my chances of getting head? I had just loaded my favorite mule Bessie into the- ''I didn't ask for any details,'' the lawyer interrupted. So do ya wanna see something really swell? Because if it had four doors it would be a chicken sedan.
He says he has an appointment. Here is my libary card, because im checking you out Hey honey! My uncle named his dogs Rolex and Timex. You're looking a little sad and gloomy. Your birth certificate is a scroll! So you need some material for a birthday party or an office your so old joke roast. Mind Your Own Business began looking for his brother behind garbage cans and bushes. I asked my co-workers for help; they offered no new ideas.
Patient: What do you mean, 10? Hot 9 months ago Farmer Joe decided his injuries from his recent accident were serious enough to take the trucking company responsible for the accident to court. Your so old you still drive a stage coach to work. After over two hours of troubleshooting, I was about to tell the customer to send the printer in to us for repair when she asked quietly, Should I try printing on a piece of white paper instead of this yellow construction paper? Yeah Then we already have 207 things in common. Take off the ring and say good bye to your house. I want you to know that this blonde went home last night and did something probably none of you could do.